CHAPTER I
How the bright flowers were springing up after the rain, and how the birds were singing in the sunshine! The Princess of Ellel looked out of a window, and plucked some cherries off a tree and ate them with the appetite of youth. Then she drew in her head and made a wry face at her maid.
“What sickly fruit you grow here; it almost beats your champagne. There’s no flavour about it--there’s no flavour about anything at all.”
“Madam!”
“I’m not. I won’t be called names. I’m not married. I never intend to be.”
“Marriage is a wonderful sweetener, lady. It takes all the unripeness off the tongue.”
“I’ll never marry, Alice.”
“But why, Princess?”
“Because I’m too--too clever. Why do you smile?”
“I was thinking of the letters, and your royal spelling.”
“I never went to a charity school, and the nation didn’t pay for my education, therefore my education was neglected. Shall I tell you a secret, Alice?”
“Yes, Princess.”
“I’m tired of being rich; I’m tired of being good. Well--why don’t you say something?”
“I’m waiting for the secret.”
“I’ve told you it. Why don’t you say something?”
“I misunderstood.”
“Oh, you uneducated charity girl! you Board-School paragon of perfect spelling! I’m tired of riches, I’m tired of virtues--can’t you understand me?”
“Not at all.”
“Then listen!” And she rested her rounded chin on a hand you longed to eat ice-cream out of--quite a shell-like miniature affair. “Here you see me dressed in gold and silver, and looking beautiful. Many a time you long to box my ears, but my position and my riches frighten you. Now, I’m going to dress in rags and leave all my money with the estate-agent. But I’m not going to tell him about the rags--I’m going to make out I’ve travelled back to Fairy Sky.”
“Must I come with you, Princess?”
“Of course--but you’ll remain a cypher in the background. You needn’t dress in rags. You can have coarse fustian, it’s more respectable and less becoming.”
“I shall be able to look after you better, dressed so.”
“I shan’t need looking after. However wicked I am, I shall say my prayers night and morning. But I’ve fallen in love. After all, a man has a certain amount of interest for a woman--if she keeps him at the specimen stage.”
Alice raised her hands and eyes in pious opposition--quite unfeigned.
“Alice, listen! I’ve fallen in love with the great High Priest. Fallen in love with him. I can feel the throb of the pulse in my heart and head now, whilst I speak.”
“But--but Princess, he cannot marry. He is too high, too holy.”
“Just why I’ve fallen in love with him. I like highness--I like holiness. You stick a pin in them, and it’s wonderful how soon you find the under-surface jump.”
“You would not prick the High Priest, Princess?”
“With a dummy pin, Alice. No one would object to a dummy pin, would they?”
“I never heard of one.”
“What did they teach you at that big Board-School you say you one time went to?”
“They led us from the known to the Unknown, madam. I am ready to follow you.”
“Well, I have fallen in love unfortunately with a man I cannot marry--and he’s growing old!”
“The great High Priest?”
“Yes, the great High Priest. Has he not a noble face? Give me that red counterpane. See here, I’ll act him for you. I’ve studied his face so often during the services, his figure too, and the exact way he walks.”
“Excellent, my lady, excellent! Who could imagine five feet so like six? Where did you learn it? You had his very nose and mouth, and your eye, as you passed me, made me shiver, just like his has often done. Where did you learn that walk? The High Priest walks like one man in a hundred.”
“Bless you, Alice, I learnt it looking at him in the Temple--when the prayers were dull. I haven’t come under the Litany headings yet; I haven’t need of any of the things they pray for.”
“Can you seriously love a man, Princess, when you take him off like that?”
“Believe me it is the only true love. If I were married to a man, I should become his walking image--that’s why I prefer to remain single. He would abuse and neglect me more than his own shadow--and end by killing me.”
“Killing you?”
“Of course. Wouldn’t you kill your double if you had one?--I mean the one who doubled you every time you turned your back by way of recreation.”
“For my peace of mind I’d never turn round to see.”
“Not bad for the Board-School at all, Alice. Oh! I love the great High Priest; I simply, simply love him.”
“At the Board-School they taught us a little self-control--to make us good citizens.”
“Ah! what is self-control?”
“Holding down the boiler lid to keep the steam in.”
“And who sits on the boiler lid?”
“Yourself.”
“But the boiler will burst.”
“Not if the fire is dead. You never sit on the boiler till the fire is out. It is rashness. If there is a fire you must have a safety-valve, and then you may sit on the lid again.”
“I like the way they taught you, Alice. The great High Priest shall be my safety-valve, then I will sit on the lid and they will say the fire is out.”