CHAPTER FIVE
It was Joe Lincoln’s proudest boast that he was a Yankee and a Cape Codder. In an article in the American Magazine in July, 1919, he said, “I am a Yankee--I was born on Cape Cod which even a prejudiced observer will concede to be within the boundaries of Yankee Land--and my ancestors on both sides of the house since 1650 or there-abouts, were Yankee, too. For thirteen or fourteen years I lived among the Cape Yankees and, after that, divided my time between them and the Boston variety. At present (1919) I am a New Jerseyman in the winter months but I hasten back to the Cape just as soon as the early June breezes begin to smell fresh and salty sweet; when leaning over the rail of the ferryboat in New York harbor, the dirty water around New York City begins to remind me of a beach where the water isn’t dirty.
“In all my forty odd years of experience with Yankees I do not remember ever having met one who habitually whittled. I have, of course, known some who whittled occasionally while they were making a ‘bow’n arrer’ or a boat for one of the children. But I never knew of one who whittled while he was making a trade. And I know very few now-a-days who chew tobacco. In fact, I have seen more tobacco chewing in the South than I ever saw on Cape Cod. And I have known fewer still who were habitually swindlers. As to their ‘shrewdness’--well, what is this so-called Yankee shrewdness, anyway?
“It must exist, or at least some trait or traits must exist which give to the New Englander the peculiar reputation he has borne for so long. I think it, or they, does, or do, exist. I think there is such a quality in the New England Yankee as a class. But it isn’t propensity to cheat or swindle. Let’s see if we can get at what it is.
“We’ll dismiss in the beginning all such moss-grown yet ever-green yarns as those of the Connecticut maker of wooden nut-megs, of the Maine man who put green spectacles on his horse so that the animal ‘would eat excelsior’ thinking it was grass.
“These are ancient and decrepit relics of the swindle idea and they were, and always were, lies, anyhow.
“There are plenty of crooks and rascals in New England,” Lincoln went on to say, “but there are also plenty in the West, South, and elsewhere. They are not respected anywhere, neither are they typical, thank goodness, of their localities.
“Another characteristic of Yankee shrewdness, it seems to me, is the faculty of observing and putting the results of observation to use. An example of this,” said Lincoln, “is the observation by Cape Codders of the cranberry which grew one hundred and fifty years on the Cape in a wild form amid the sand dunes. One day a Cape Codder, noticing that the cranberry grew best in sand, began experimenting and now the Cape Cod cranberry brings the highest price in U. S. markets.”
Lincoln loved to tell stories about Cape Cod skippers, not only in his books and magazine articles and stories, but whenever he got the chance in conversation. One of his favorite stories was about a race between a Cape Cod captain and an English master in two barks in the Mediterranean. By bluff and shrewd observation of the wind the Cape Cod skipper sailed his ship under scant canvas as if expecting a gale during the day. The other skipper, observing that his opponent was being cautious, figured that a gale was due and followed the Cape Codder’s example. When night came the Cape Cod skipper crowded all the canvass possible on his bark and left his rival far behind. This was an example of Yankee shrewdness which Lincoln delighted to point out.
Lincoln loved to tell of the various characteristics of Cape Cod sea going men in many different varieties of stories.
“The old sea captains of Provincetown were tremendously patriotic,” Lincoln declared in a newspaper interview.
To stamp this point indelibly on his interviewer’s mind he resorted to one of his beloved anecdotes.
“An old sea captain had his ship gaily bedecked with flags as it lay at anchor in a foreign port.
“‘What’s the occasion of the decorations?’ inquired a British Consul, as he stepped aboard.
“‘Why, this is the 17th of June, the anniversary of Bunker Hill’, replied the captain.
“‘But why in the world should you Yankees celebrate that event?’ said the Britisher. ‘You know we were in possession of that hill when the battle was over.’
“The old tar leaned forward and tapping the consul’s shirt front with his forefinger drawled.
“‘Yes, but who is in possession of the hill now?’”
In another example of Yankee shrewdness and judgment Lincoln told the story of the slick real estate salesman who tried to do an old captain a favor by selling him real estate of great value.
Said the old captain to Lincoln after having thoroughly squelched the slicker: “When a perfect stranger is so ever lastin’ anxious to give you a bite of his apple that he shoves it between your teeth, look out for the worm.”
Still another yarn which Lincoln liked to spin was the story of the Cape Cod captain who, after returning home from a long sea voyage, was besieged by the town “dead beat” for a handout. The captain sent the poor unfortunate what he thought he most needed--a cake of soap!