Chapter 127 of 247 · 451 words · ~2 min read

CCLXVII.

[The following is part of a comic song called 'Success to the Whistle and Wig,' intended to be sung in rotation by the members of a club.]

There was an old woman had three sons, Jerry, and James, and John: Jerry was hung, James was drowned, John was lost and never was found, And there was an end of the three sons, Jerry, and James, and John!

CCLXVIII.

[The tale on which the following story is founded is found in a MS. of the fifteenth century, preserved in the Chetham Library at Manchester.]

There was an old man, who lived in a wood, As you may plainly see; He said he could do as much work in a day, As his wife could do in three. With all my heart, the old woman said, If that you will allow, To-morrow you'll stay at home in my stead, And I'll go drive the plough:

But you must milk the Tidy cow, For fear that she go dry; And you must feed the little pigs That are within the sty; And you must mind the speckled hen, For fear she lay away; And you must reel the spool of yarn That I spun yesterday.

The old woman took a staff in her hand, And went to drive the plough: The old man took a pail in his hand, And went to milk the cow; But Tidy hinched, and Tidy flinched, And Tidy broke his nose, And Tidy gave him such a blow, That the blood ran down to his toes.

High! Tidy! ho! Tidy! high! Tidy! do stand still; If ever I milk you, Tidy, again, 'Twill be sore against my will! He went to feed the little pigs, That were within the sty; He hit his head against the beam, And he made the blood to fly.

He went to mind the speckled hen, For fear she'd lay astray, And he forgot the spool of yarn His wife spun yesterday.

So he swore by the sun, the moon, and the stars, And the green leaves on the tree, If his wife didn't do a day's work in her life, She should ne'er be ruled by he.

There was an old man of Tobago, Who lived on rice, gruel, and sago; Till, much to his bliss, His physician said this-- "To a leg, sir, of mutton you may go."

Oh, dear, what can the matter be? Two old women got up in an apple tree; One came down, And the other staid till Saturday.

There was an old man, And he had a calf, And that's half; He took him out of the stall, And put him on the wall; And that's all.