Part 7
Don't take it hard if I say in your ear, Santa, I thought you were partial last year; Loading the rich folks with everything gay, Snubbing the poor ones who came in your way. Now of all times of the year I am sure This is the time to remember the poor.
Plenty of children there are in our city, Who have no fathers or mothers to pity; Plenty of people whose working and heeding Scarcely can keep all their dear ones from needing. Now, if I came every year in December, These are the ones I would surely remember.
Once on a beautiful Christmas you know Jesus our Saviour was born here below, Patiently stooping to hunger and pain, So He might save us, His lost ones, from shame; Now if we love Him, He bids us to feed All His poor brothers and sisters who need.
Blessed old Nick! I was sure if you knew it, You would remember and certainly do it; This year, at least, when you empty your pack, Pray give a portion to all who may lack. Then, if there's anything left and you can Bring a small gift to wee Peter Pan.
_--Emily H. Miller.--Adapted._
MRS. O'TOOLE (_applauding vigorously_). Wasn't that dandy? Sure, little Mary Ann has a wonderful education, so she has!
MRS. MULLIGAN. She takes after her own mother. I was just like her when I was that age.
MRS. O'TOOLE. And you're just like her still, Mollie Mulligan. Sure you're the sunshine of Mulligan Alley and the belle of Shantytown.
MRS. MULLIGAN. Whist now! It's covered I am wid blushes. But, hush! I think the show is about to begin.
ACT III.
_Curtain rises disclosing the same scene. Three long sheets hang on the line, reaching down to the floor and extending clear across the stage. The children are behind the sheets. The line is about three and one-half feet high. The table sets obliquely in front of the door at R. It is covered with a sheet or long cloth reaching to the ground._ PATSY _and_ TEDDY _form the dwarf._ PATSY, _coatless, has a long pair of striped stockings on over his arms, and a pair of shoes on his hands, ornamented on insteps with large rosettes._ TEDDY _stands behind him and thrusts his arms as far as they will go under_ PATSY'S _armpits. A kind of a tunic covers both. Wear a large crimped frill or an enormous turned-down collar._
PATSY _stands behind table and places his shoe-clad hands upon it, which represent the feet of the dwarf. The door curtains are fastened together a few inches above his head, concealing_ TEDDY.
PATSY _must lean slightly over the table or the legs will not appear to support the body._
_When the curtain is up, enter_ MATSY _from L. dressed as a Showman._
MATSY (_bows to audience, speaks in a loud voice, using megaphone_).
Come and see Jumbo, Samson symbolical! Come and see Slivers, Clown really comical! Come and see Zip, the foremost of freaks! Come and see Palestine's Sinister Sheiks! Eager Equestriennes, each unexcelled, Most mammoth menagerie ever beheld, The Giant, the Fat Girl, the Lion-faced Man, Aerial Artists from far-off Japan, Audacious Acrobats shot from a gun, Don't miss the greatest show under the sun!
Now, if you will kindly lend me your ears for a moment, I will fill them free of charge with a few words concerning the world's greatest assortment of marvelous monstrosities. In the first cell we have Senor Macaroni Spaghetti from the land of the banana. The senor is thirty-nine inches high, and, strangely enough, thirty-nine years old, to say nothing of the fact that he weighs thirty-nine pounds. (PATSY _scratches his nose with his foot._) He arrived last week by parcel post to join our circus. The senor is looking for a wife. Oh, you needn't laugh! It's true. Some of you near-sighted ladies should have brought magnifying glasses, for Senor Macaroni Spaghetti is the smallest speck of humanity that ever lived in captivity. He stands on a silver dollar and puts his hand in a thimble. (TEDDY _makes funny gestures during this entire speech._) The senor will now entertain you in his entertaining way.
PATSY (_sings_).
SPAGHETTI FROM OLD ITALY.
(Music on page 107)
Me name is Spaghetti, I came o'er the sea, To visit this land from old Italy, I have a small monkey, he jumps with a string, And if he was here to you he would sing: (_Dances._) Tee-oodle, dum-doodle, dum-doodle, dum day!
(_Repeat until end._)
I once fell in love with the sweet Antoinette, She say she will marry the little Spaghett, But she said she no like-a a hand-organ man, So I stand on the corner and sell-a banan. (_Dances._) Tee-oodle, dum-doodle, dum-doodle, dum day!
(_Repeat until end._)
I wed Antoinetta and live in a flat, I buy-a fine clothes and a big silk-a hat, I make-a much money and this little gent, He maybe some day will be big President. (_Dances._) Tee-oodle, dum-doodle, dum-doodle, dum day!
(_Repeat until end._)
MATSY. And now, ladies and gentlemen, I'll call your attention to the seven little Sunbonnet babies. Behold them, them famous Mulligan twins. (_Exits L._)
_The heads of_ NORA, MICKY, BRIDGET, MARY ANN, MELISSA, CLARISSA _and_ PETER _appear above the sheets at rear. Each wears a large sunbonnet. They sing to the tune "Tramp, Tramp, Tramp!"_
Little Mulligans are we, and our hearts are light and free, For it's Christmas Eve and soon we'll be in bed, We're peculiar little folks, full of jollity and jokes, And you ought to see us stand upon our head!
Tramp, tramp, tramp, we'll soon be marching, We are going off to bed, But before we leave you now, Each of us will show you how Little Mulligan can stand upon her head.
(_All disappear under sheet. They repeat chorus and hold up their arms above the sheet. The arms are covered with stockings and shoes are on their hands. They slap hands together, making feet dance, etc._)
Tramp, tramp, tramp, we'll soon be marching, We are going off to bed, But before we leave you now, Each of us will show you how Little Mulligan can stand upon her head.
(_Repeat._)
MRS. MULLIGAN (_from audience_). Nora! Bridget! Mary Ann! What do ye mane! You'll kill yourselves entirely. (_Rushes to the stage, followed by_ MRS. O'TOOLE.) If you stand on your head like that, all your brains will rush down into your fate.
NORA (_head above curtain_). That's the way they did in the show. (_All come out on stage._)
MRS. O'TOOLE. Well, well, well, wonders will never cease. Sure, I niver spint such a fine Christmas Eve in all me life before.
MRS. MULLIGAN (_stands C. facing audience, surrounded by the ten children._) Sure, I think we've had a fine Christmas celebration, don't you? And before ye go let this sink down deep in your hearts and minds--it doesn't take money and fine clothes and costly gifts to make a fine Christmas at all, at all. All it takes is loving hearts and loving hands, and merry faces of happy boys and girls. We didn't have any money--but you see what a lovely time we've had--and it's all because the spirit of Christmas was in our hearts--and the spirit of Christmas means love, and love is the greatest thing in all the world. Merry Christmas to all of yeez, and may ye never regret the time you spent Christmas Eve with the ten little Mulligans.
CURTAIN.
NOTES TO THE MANAGER.
WHERE THE MULLIGANS LIVED.
The scenery is very simple or may be dispensed with entirely. Entrances R. and L. and a window at the rear are necessary. An old table stands in front of the window, and a larger table, also old, stands down R. Several soap boxes are down L. and these with an upturned bucket serve as seats for the Mulligans.
An old rag carpet covers the floor. A wash-tub, with wash-board, clothes, etc., stand at C. Two rickety chairs are on the stage, one R.C. and one L.C., the latter a rocking-chair. The larger table is covered with a well worn red cloth and supports an old-fashioned lighted lamp.
Several tin cans, filled with bright flowers, stand on the table in front of the window. Curtains or bed comforts are draped over the door at R. An old sofa stands up L. Colored prints adorn the walls.
A clothes line runs across the stage at rear. On this line several garments are drying, bright stockings, a union suit, red flannels, etc. Remember the scene is laid in Mulligan Alley and the stage must be arranged according to Mulligan taste.
WHAT THE MULLIGANS WORE.
MRS. MULLIGAN--Powdered hair, parted in middle and combed over ears, somewhat unkempt. Well worn, old-fashioned cloth waist, with sleeves rolled up and open in the neck. Skirt of contrasting color. The skirt is turned up, showing flannel petticoat. Unstarched and rather soiled dark gingham apron, of ample proportions, but without bib. Hair twisted in knob at the back of head. Large, old shoes.
MATSY and PATSY--Long, tattered trousers, old suspenders, large, well worn shoes, calico shirts, torn and patched. Bright calico neckties. Caps. In Act III Matsy wears a large black mustache, a long black coat, much too large, and a stiff hat three sizes too big, while Patsy wears the dwarf's tunic and has his face made up yellow, with rouge on cheeks.
TEDDY and MICKY--Short trousers, well worn and patched. Striped stockings. Old shirts.
NORA and BRIDGET--Ankle skirts, waists of a different color. Bright calico bows. Large hair ribbons.
MARY ANN, MELISSA and CLARISSA--Short skirts. Striped stockings. Old shoes. Funny hats and waists.
PETER PAN--Calico slip. Baby's hat.
MRS. O'TOOLE--Old-fashioned walking dress of bright colors. Shawl and little bonnet. Red wig, if desired.
THE WISHING MAN
[Illustration:
Type of Type of WISHING MAN FRENCH DOLLS TIN SOLDIERS KA-ZIN-SKI
GRANDPA GRANDMA FATHER MOTHER NURSEMAID
DUMPLING TOOTSY SNOOKUMS ATTENUATED ROLY POLY TOOTSY DUMPLING
ENLARGED Type of SNOOKUMS BEARS JIM DANDY BABY JUMBO]
THE WISHING MAN
A CHRISTMAS WHIMSY FOR SWEETE CHARITIE.
IN THREE SHORT ACTS.
_As presented by Class No. 10, Wesley Chapel, Columbus, Ohio. Re-written from memory._
CHARACTERS.
THE WISHING MAN _Young Man_ THE ROLY-POLY DUMPLING _Stout Young Man_ THE ATTENUATED TOOTSY _Tall, Thin Young Man_ THE ENLARGED SNOOKUMS _Young Man_ GRANDPA GREEN _Boy of Fourteen or Fifteen_ GRANDMA GREEN _Plump Girl of same age_ FATHER FRITZ _Boy of about Fourteen_ MOTHER FRITZ _Girl of about Fifteen_ NURSE MAID _Girl of about Thirteen_ DUMPLING _Boy of Eight_ TOOTSY _Girl of Seven or Eight_ SNOOKUMS _Boy of Six or under_ KA-ZIN-SKI _Tall Boy_ TEDDY BEAR _Small Boy_ JIMMIE BEAR _Small Boy_ BABY JUMBO _Made of Two Larger Boys_ ANNETTE _Little Girl_ BABETTE _Little Girl_ OLIVETTE _Little Girl_ PRIVATE BLACK _Little Boy_ PRIVATE JACK _Little Boy_ PRIVATE MACK _Little Boy_ JIM DANDY, _a Stick of Candy_ _Little Boy_
* * * * *
TIME OF PLAYING--_About Forty-five Minutes._
* * * * *
_For description of costumes, scenery, etc., see "Remarks on Production" at the end of the play._
ACT I.
SCENE: _A room in_ FATHER FRITZ'S _house. Doors at R. and L. Small table down L. with three chairs around it. Sofa down R. Easy chair down C. Lighted lamp on table. Window at rear._ DUMPLING _is seated on a rocking-horse at rear C._ GRANDPA _stands by him helping him rock it._ TOOTSY _is on a rocking-horse at L. front, with_ FATHER _and_ MOTHER _helping her rock it._ SNOOKUMS _is on a baby rocking-horse at R. front, with_ GRANDMA _and_ NURSE MAID _in attendance. Very little furniture on stage. If the rocking-horses are not easy to get,_ DUMPLING _and_ TOOTSY _may be astride of sticks with horses' heads._
_Curtain rises to bright music._
ALL (_sing_).
HOP, HOP, HOP!
[Music illustration:
1. Hop, hop, hop! Nim-ble as a top, Where 'tis smooth and where 'tis sto-ny, Trudge a-long, my lit-tle po-ny, Hop, hop, hop, hop, hop! Nim-ble as a top.
2. Whoa, whoa, whoa! How like fun you go! Ver-y well, my lit-tle po-ny, Safe's our jaunt tho' rough and sto-ny, Spare, spare, spare, spare, spare! Sure e-nough we're there.
3. Here, here, here! Yes, my po-ny dear; Now with oats and hay I'll treat you, And with smiles will ev-er greet you, Po-ny, po-ny dear! Yes, my po-ny dear.]
DUMPLING (_dismounting_). Whoa, there, Jimmie! Oh, Grandpa, I do love my pony. It's the best of all my presents.
GRANDPA. Well, it's time you put him in his stall.
TOOTSY (_dismounting_). I'm going to call my pony after Mr. ----. (_Insert the name of some well known man._) 'Cause he looks just like him.
GRANDMA (_helping_ SNOOKUMS _from pony_). And what are you going to call your pony, Snookums?
SNOOKUMS. Going to call him Elizabeth, after you, Grandma.
GRANDMA (_kisses her_). That's my baby!
MOTHER. Grandma, we'd better get our hats and coats. It's nearly time for the car to be after us.
FATHER. Come, Grandpa. It's nearly eight o'clock.
GRANDPA. But I don't like to leave the children.
DUMPLING. And we don't like to have you leave us, either. My, this has been the grandest Christmas day I've ever seen.
MOTHER. Come, Grandma. (_Exits L. with_ GRANDMA.)
GRANDPA. Come, children. (_They gather around him._) I'm glad you've had such a happy Christmas. You got everything you wanted, didn't you?
TOOTSY. Yes, everything. My, I wish Christmas would come every day.
DUMPLING. Tell us the story about old Saint Nick, Grandpa.
GRANDPA. Do you want to hear that old chestnut again?
CHILDREN. Oh, yes, yes!
GRANDPA (_takes_ SNOOKUMS _on his lap, the other children stand by his knee._)
'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse; The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, In hopes that Saint Nicholas soon would be there. The children were nestled all snug in their beds, While visions of sugar-plums danced through their heads; Grandma in her kerchief and I in my cap, Had just settled our brains for a long winter's nap,-- When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter. Away to the window I flew like a flash, Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.
When what to my wondering eyes would appear But a wee little sleigh and eight little reindeer, With a wee little driver, so lively and quick, I knew in a moment it must be Saint Nick. More rapid than eagles his reindeers they came, And he whistled and shouted and called them by name: "Now, Dasher! Now, Dancer! Now, Prancer and Vixen! On, Comet! On, Cupid! On, Donder and Blitzen! To the top of the porch, to the top of the wall! Now, dash away, dash away, dash away, all."
So up to the housetop the reindeer they flew, With a sleigh full of toys, and Saint Nicholas, too. As I drew in my head and was turning around, Down the chimney Saint Nicholas came with a bound. He was dressed all in red from his head to his foot, And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot. His eyes, how they twinkled! His dimples how merry! His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry. He had a broad face and a little round belly That shook when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly.
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread. He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work And filled all the stockings; then turned with a jerk, And laying his finger aside of his nose, And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose. He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle, And away they all flew like the down of a thistle; But I heard him exclaim e'er he drove out of sight: "Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!"
--_Clement C. Moore._
CHILDREN. Oh, that was just lovely.
TOOTSY. I just wish I could see him. Just once!
DUMPLING. And so do I. I'm going to catch him some Christmas Eve.
SNOOKUMS. Me, too!
_Enter from L._, MOTHER _and_ GRANDMA, _wearing winter coats and hats. They carry coats and hats for_ FATHER _and_ GRANDPA.
MOTHER. Here, Grandpa, put on your coat and hat, or we'll be late for the dinner. (_Helps him._)
GRANDPA. I'd rather stay here and talk to the children.
FATHER (_putting on his coat_). But Aunt Clara is expecting us.
GRANDMA. And the auto is at the door.
GRANDPA. Dumpling, are you sure you got everything you wanted for Christmas?
DUMPLING. I can't think of anything else.
GRANDPA. If you didn't, and if all three of you children can agree on anything else, it shall be yours if money can buy it.
TOOTSY. Money can buy everything, can't it, Grandpa?
GRANDPA. No, my dear, not quite everything.
DUMPLING. But suppose we wish for something that money can't buy?
GRANDPA. I'd try to get it for you some other way.
TOOTSY. How, Grandpa; how?
GRANDPA. Why, I'd tell the Wishing Man. He'd get it for you.
GRANDMA. Come along, John; don't put such nonsense in the children's heads.
FATHER. We must hurry along to Aunt Clara's, children. But this is Christmas night. You may all stay up tonight just as long as you wish.
DUMPLING. Oh, can we? Can we?
MOTHER. Yes. Cecelia will look after you. Cecelia?
NURSE MAID. Of course I will, mum.
MOTHER. Come along, now. We must hurry. (_Kisses the children and goes out R. with_ GRANDMA, GRANDPA _and_ FATHER.)
TOOTSY (_dancing around_). Oh, we can stay up just as long as we wish! Goody, goody! Why that is the very best gift of all.
NURSE MAID. Now you children be good, and if you want me, call out. I'll be down in the kitchen with the cook. (_Goes out at L._)
DUMPLING. Now we're left all alone.
TOOTSY. I don't see why Aunt Clara couldn't have invited us to her dinner party, too.
SNOOKUMS (_playing with doll_). Snookums likes dinner party.
DUMPLING. It's 'cause we ain't big enough.
TOOTSY. My, I wisht I was a great, great, great big girl.
DUMPLING. There, that's a wish that money can't buy.
TOOTSY. Grandpa said he'd get us anything we wished for.
DUMPLING. What do you wish, Snookums?
SNOOKUMS. Wish Grandpaw would come home.
TOOTSY. I know a real good wish. I wish it were Christmas every day. Don't you, Dumpling?
DUMPLING. No, I don't. We'd have to have a present and a tree and a turkey and plum pudding every day of our lives. We'd get awfully tired of it after a while. Just think, we'd have to give away about a million presents every year.
TOOTSY. I'll tell you what I really do wish.
DUMPLING. What?
TOOTSY. I wish we could do just like grown up folks do. I wish I was the biggest little girl in all the world.
DUMPLING. And I wish so, too. I wish we were just awfully, awfully, awfully big--and then we could go to Aunt Clara's dinner party, and everywhere.
SNOOKUMS. Me wish me was great big Snookums.
TOOTSY. But money couldn't buy that wish, Dumpling.
DUMPLING. No, that's right. But Grandpa said if he couldn't buy our wish he'd get it some other way.
TOOTSY. How could he get it?
DUMPLING. He said he'd tell the Wishing Man.
TOOTSY. My, I wonder if there really is such a person!
DUMPLING. I don't know. But I'd like to see him if there is.
TOOTSY. I'll make a rhyme.
Good Mr. Wishing Man, how do you do? If there is such a person, we'd like to see you!
DUMPLING.
If you come from afar, if you come from near, Good Mr. Wishing Man, appear, appear!
_The_ WISHING MAN _rolls out from under the table, rises, faces the three children, arms akimbo._
WISHING MAN (_after a pause, drawls_). Well?
DUMPLING _and_ TOOTSY (_frightened, down R._). Well? (_They look at each other, pause, then repeat._) Well!
SNOOKUMS (_comes in front of them, stands facing the_ WISHING MAN, _arms akimbo_). Well?
WISHING MAN. Well, I'm here.
DUMPLING. Who's here?
WISHING MAN. Why, _I_ am here. You said you would like to see me and so I have come. _I'm_ here.
TOOTSY. Are you the Wishing Man?
WISHING MAN. That's my name. (_Sings to the tune of "Wearing of the Green." He sings briskly, shaking head in time and dancing a step or two._)
I'm the friend of all the children, And I'll help you if I can, Just tell me what your wishes are, For I'm the Wishing Man. I have wishbones on my fingers, I have myst'ry in my eyes, My clothes are trimmed with horseshoes, And they're stained with magic dyes. My pocket's full of rabbits' feet, And clover leaves and charms, For luck I've got a big black cat All tattooed on my arms, I'm a friend of all the children, And I'll help you if I can, So tell me what your wishes are-- For I'm the Wishing Man.
I come from a distant country Away up near the pole, But the things that I am telling you, You mustn't tell a soul. I know every witch and goblin, And if you would believe! I have fortunes in my pocket-book, And wonders up my sleeve. When any little boy or girl Says, "Wishing Man, appear!" I jump right up from underneath, And here I am, my dear! I'm a friend of all the children, And I'll help you if I can, So tell me what your wishes are-- For I'm the Wishing Man.
DUMPLING. And can you really grant us anything we wish for?
WISHING MAN. I can, if it's a good wish--and if you all agree on the same thing.
TOOTSY. Anything in the wide, wide world?
WISHING MAN. Well, pretty nearly anything. Would you like some new toys?
TOOTSY. Oh, no, thank you. This is Christmas, you know, and we got ever so many toys.
SNOOKUMS. Ever so many toys.
WISHING MAN. I don't see what you called me for. You seem to have everything you want.
DUMPLING. Oh, no, we haven't. We've made a wish, and we're all agreed on it.
WISHING MAN. Are you sure it's a good wish?
DUMPLING. Oh, yes, it's an awful good wish. You see, we want to be great big children so we can stay up late at night and go to Aunt Clara's dinner parties. That's our wish. We want to be the biggest children there are anywhere.
WISHING MAN (_laughs heartily_). Oh, ho, ho, ho! That's the funniest wish I ever heard since I've been in the wishing business. So you want to be the very biggest children there are anywhere, do you?
TOOTSY. Yes, sir; that's just what we want. I want to be a great, big, tall little girl.
WISHING MAN (_laughing_). A great, big tall little girl, hey?
DUMPLING. And I want to be a great, big, big, _big_ little boy.
WISHING MAN. Oh, a big, _big_, BIG little boy, hey?
SNOOKUMS. And so do I.
WISHING MAN. And so do you, hey?
CHILDREN. Yes, sir; that is our wish.
WISHING MAN. Well, I'll have to see if I can accommodate you. It's a pretty big job, you know.
TOOTSY. You said you could give us anything we wished for.
WISHING MAN. But I didn't think you'd wish for anything like that.
DUMPLING. That's the only thing we want, Mr Wishing Man.
WISHING MAN (_rubbing his chin and speaking thoughtfully_). Well, now--let me see. I'm afraid it's too big a job for me. In the first place I haven't any marble.
CHILDREN. Marble?