Part 16

The body of the bridegroom (and, I think, of the bride should she die first) should be burnt in the aupasana agni prepared on the first day of the wedding. The aupasana agni is, as it were, a witness to the marriage. In the courtyard, the nandimukham ceremony is performed for propitiation of the minor deities and the pitris (spirits of deceased ancestors). A pot containing sacred or consecrated water, a piece of sandalwood, a piece of gold, flowers, raw rice, and some fruits are the apparent object of adoration. It is called kalas--the kalasam of the Tamil and Telugu countries--and is a common symbol of the deity. According to Monier Williams, [97] it should be worshipped thus. "In the mouth of the water-vessel abideth Vishnu, in its neck is Rudra, in its lower part is Brahma, while the whole company of the mothers are congregated in its middle part. O! Ganges, Yamuna, Godavari, Saraswati, Narmada, Sindhu and Kaveri, be present in this water." A part of the aforesaid ceremony (nandimukham) is called the punyahavachana, for which the bridegroom repeats certain hymns after the Vadhyar, and is sprinkled with water from the kalas. While all this is being done in the courtyard, the very same ceremony is performed within the house in the presence of the bride, whose father does inside the house what the bridegroom is doing outside. At the conclusion of the ceremony, the tali is tied on the bride's neck. Then two of the cloths brought by the bridegroom are sent inside, and are touched by the bride. After she has touched them, they are again brought out, and the bridegroom puts them on. He touches the other two cloths, which are taken inside, and worn by the bride. A feast (ayanium) is the next item. The bride and bridegroom eat their share of it in separate rooms. Then comes the marriage proper. The bride's father washes the bridegroom's feet, while a Nayar woman waves a light (ayiram tiri or thousand lights) before his face, and conducts him to the hall prepared for the wedding. In this is a mantapam, or sort of raised seat, having four pillars and a covering roof. The pillars of the mantapam, and the ceiling of the hall, are covered with red cloth (red being an auspicious colour), and there are festoons of mango leaves. To one side of the mantapam is a screen, behind which stand the Nambutiri women of the household, looking at the scene in the hall through holes. The bride and bridegroom are led to the mantapam, the former following the latter screened from the general gaze by a big cadjan umbrella. She hands him a garland, and, in doing so, she should not touch his hand. He puts on the garland. Vedic hymns are chanted, and the pair are brought face to face for the first time. This is called mukhadarsanam, or seeing the face. The bridegroom leads the bride three times round the fire and water jar, moving round to the right, repeating a mantram, which is rendered as follows by Monier Williams. [98] "I am male, thou art female. Come, let us marry, let us possess offspring. United in affection, illustrious, well disposed towards each other, let us live for a hundred years." Each time the bridegroom leads the bride round, he causes her to mount a mill-stone, saying "Ascend thou this stone, and be thou firm as this rock. [99]" Then, at a moment supposed to be auspicious, water is poured on the hands of the bridegroom, signifying that the girl and her dowry have been handed over to him. The Nambutiri women behind the screen, and the Nayar women in the hall, utter a shrill cry "like that of the Vaikura." The fire here mentioned is probably taken from the original aupasana agni. Holding the bride by the hand, the bridegroom leads her seven steps--one for force, two for strength, three for wealth, four for well-being, five for offspring, six for the seasons, and seven as a friend. He tells her to be devoted to him, and to bear him many sons, who may live to a good old age. This ceremony is called the saptapadi (seven steps). A homam is then performed. It is said that the fire used on this occasion must be preserved until the death of the bridegroom, and used at the cremation of his body. A feast is the next thing. When it is over, the bride's father takes her on his lap, asks his son-in-law to treat her well, and formally hands her over to him. The bridegroom promises to do so, and takes his wife by the hand. Then there is a procession to the bridegroom's illam, the bride being carried in a litter, and the bridegroom walking and carrying the sacrificial fire. So ends the first day. It seems that the newly-married couple live apart for the next three days, during which the bride is initiated into household duties. The only daily ceremony is the homam, which is done by the pair after bathing, and before taking food. On the fourth day there is a ceremony, in which the bride plants a jasmine cutting, by way of symbolising help to her husband in the performance of his religious duties. At night the couple are conducted to the bridal chamber by the Vadhyar. The bed is merely a grass mat, or a common country blanket, covered with a white sheet, and having a little ridge of rice and paddy, signifying plenty, round the edge. The Vadhyar withdraws, and the bridegroom shuts the door. [100] The Vadhyar outside cites appropriate passages from the sacred writings, which are repeated by the bridegroom. On the fifth day, the bride and bridegroom anoint each other with oil, and the latter combs the hair of the former. Then, before bathing, they catch some little fish called manatt kani (eyes looking up) which are found in pools, with a cloth used as a net. While this is being done, a Brahmachari asks the bridegroom "Did you see a cow and a son?" Pointing to the fishes caught in the cloth, the bridegroom replies "Yes, they are here." This is said to be suggestive of progeny, fishes being emblematic of fertility. Homam is then done. At night, the bridegroom adorns the bride with flowers, and makes her look into a mirror, while he recites mantrams suitable to the occasion. From the sixth to the ninth day there is practically nothing in the way of ceremonial. And, as that proper to the tenth day is invariably done on the sixth day, the ceremony may be said to conclude on the night of the sixth day. A few Brahmans are fed to please the pitris, and the couple go to a jak tree, under which some rice, curds, and ghi are placed on kusa grass, and an offering is made of flowers and sandalwood or powder. The kankanam, bamboo staff, arrow, and mirror are given to the Vadhyar, and the wedding is over.

Sir W. W. Hunter [101] speaks of the Nambutiris as "a despised class," they having had fishermen ancestors. The little ceremony of catching fish, which is a very important item in the marriage rites, may look like preservation in meaningless ceremonial of something real in the past, but it only shows that, in an endeavour to interpret ceremonial, we must be far from hasty. Among the Shivalli Brahmans of South Canara, the marriage mat is taken to a tank in procession. The bride and bridegroom make a pretence of catching fish, and, with linked fingers, touch their foreheads. It is recorded, in the Manual of South Canara, that "all Tulu chronicles agree in ascribing the creation of Malabar and Canara, or Kerala, Tuluva, and Haiga, to Parasu Rama, who reclaimed from the sea as much land as he could cover by hurling his battle-axe from the top of the western ghauts. According to Tulu traditions, after a quarrel with Brahmans who used to come to him periodically from Ahi-Kshetra, Parasu Rama procured new Brahmans for the reclaimed tract by taking the nets of some fishermen, and making a number of Brahmanical threads with which he invested the fishermen, and thus turned them into Brahmans, and retired to the mountains to meditate, after informing them that, if they were in distress, and called on him, he would come to their aid. After the lapse of some time, during which they suffered no distress, they were curious to know if Parasu Rama would remember them, and called upon him in order to find out. He promptly appeared, but punished their thus mocking him by cursing them, and causing them to revert to their old status of Sudras."

A more detailed account of the marriage ceremonial is given in the Gazetteer of Malabar, which may well be quoted. "The first preliminaries in arranging a Nambudiri marriage are the inevitable comparison of horoscopes, and the settlement of the dowry. When these have been satisfactorily concluded, an auspicious day for the wedding is selected in consultation with the astrologer. On that day, the bridegroom, before he starts from his illam, partakes with his relatives and friends of a sumptuous repast called the ayani un. A similar feast is held simultaneously at the bride's house. On leaving the illam, as he crosses the threshold, and indeed on all occasions of importance, the bridegroom must be careful to put his right foot first. He also mutters mantrams of an auspicious nature, called mangala sutrangal. As he passes out of the gate, he is met by a bevy of Nayar ladies, carrying the eight lucky articles (ashtamangalyam). These are a grandha, a washed cloth, a cheppu or rouge-box, some rice, a val kannadi or metal hand-mirror, some kunkumam (crimson powder), chanthu (ointment of sandal, camphor, musk and saffron), and mashi (bdellium or any eye salve). On his journey to the bride's illam, he is preceded by a noisy procession of Nayars, armed with swords and lacquered shields, who constitute his agambadi or body-guard, and by Nambudri friends and relatives, one of whom carries a lighted lamp. At the gate of the bride's illam he is met by a band of Nayar women, dressed like antarjanams, and carrying the ashtamangalyam and lighted lamps. The bridegroom enters the inner court-yard (nadumittam), and takes his seat in the usual eastward position. The bride's father comes and sits opposite him, and, clasping his right hand, formally invites him to bathe and wed his daughter, an invitation which he formally accepts. After his bath, he returns clad in fresh clothes, and wearing a ring of dharba or kusa grass (Cynodon Dactylon), and takes his seat in the room adjoining the porch (pumukham), called purattalam. He then makes an offering of a few fanams (money) to his family deities, performs Ganapathi puja (worship of the elephant god), and presents four or five Nambudris with a few fanams each, and with betel leaf and areca nut. This is called asramapischetha prayaschittam, and is in expiation of any sins into which he may have been betrayed during his bachelor days. Similar gifts are also made first to two Nambudris of any gotra considered as representing the deities called Visvadvas, and then to two others of different gotras representing the deceased ancestors or Pitris. The last gift is called Nandimukham. Meanwhile, within the house the bride is conducted to the vadakkini room, veiled in an old cloth, and carrying a piece of bell-metal shaped like a hand-mirror (val kannadi). Her father, after washing his feet and putting on a darbha ring, comes and performs Ganapathi puja, and repeats more or less the same ritual that has been performed without. The bride is then sprinkled with holy water by her father and four other Nambudiris. The tali or marriage symbol is brought in a brass vessel containing holy water, and laid near the idol to which the daily domestic worship is paid; and, after further offerings to Ganapathi, the bridegroom is summoned to enter the illam. Before doing so he purifies himself, taking off the darbha ring, making the 'caste marks' with holy ashes (bhasmam), washing his feet, replacing the ring, and being sprinkled with holy water by four Nambudiris--a form of ritual which recurs constantly in all ceremonies. He enters the nadumittam, preceded by a Nambudiri carrying a lighted lamp, and takes his seat on a wooden stool (pidam) in the middle of the court where the bride's father makes obeisance to him, and is given four double lengths of cloth (kaccha), which the bridegroom has brought with him. They are taken to the bride, who puts on two of them, and returns two for the bridegroom to wear. The bridegroom then goes to the kizhakkini, where he prepares what may be called the "altar." He smears part of the floor in front of him with cow-dung and then, with a piece of jack-wood (Artocarpus integrifolia), called sakalam, draws a line at the western side of the place so prepared, and at right angles to this line five more, one at each end, but not actually touching it, and three between these. He then places the pieces of jack-wood on the altar, and ignites it with fire brought from the hearth of the bride's illam. He feeds the flame with chips of plasu or chamatha (Butea frondosa). This fire is the aupasana agni, regarded as the witness to the marriage rite. It must be kept alight--not actually, but by a pious fiction [102]--till the parties to the marriage die, and their funeral pyre must be kindled from it. Three pieces of plasu called paridhi, and eighteen pieces called udhmam, tied together by a string of darbha, are placed on the northern side of the altar on two pieces of jack-wood; and there are also brought and placed round the altar four blades of darbha grass, a small bell-metal vessel, an earthenware pot full of water, a pair of grind-stones (ammi and ammikuzha), a small winnowing fan containing parched paddy (malar), and a copper vessel of ghee (clarified butter) with a sacrificial ladle made of plasu. Meanwhile, the bride's father ties the tali round her neck in the vadakkini, and her mother gives her a garland of tulasi (Ocimum sanctum). She is conducted to the kizhakkini, preceded by a Nambutiri carrying a lamp called ayyira tiri (thousand wicks), and is made to stand facing the bridegroom on the north or north-east of the altar. This is called mukha-dharsanam (face-beholding). She gives the garland to the bridegroom. Now comes the central rite of this elaborate ceremonial, the udaga-purva-kannyaka-dhanam, or gift of a maiden with water. The bride and her father stand facing west, and the bridegroom facing them. All three stretch out their right hands, so that the bride's hand is between those of her father and the bridegroom, which are above and below hers respectively. A Nambutiri Othikan or ritual expert pours water thrice into the father's hand. The latter each time pours it into his daughter's hand, and then, grasping her hand, pours it into the bridegroom's hand. The dowry is then given to the bride, who hands it over to the bridegroom. She then passes between him and the fire, and sits on an amana palaga [103] on the east of the altar, while the bridegroom sits on another palaga on her left, and burns the udhmams (except one piece of plasu and the darbha string used to tie the bundle), and makes an oblation of ghee called agharam. The next rite is called Panigrahanam. The bridegroom rises from his seat, turns to the right, and stands facing the bride, who remains seated, holding the mirror in her left hand. She stretches out her right hand palm upwards, with the fingers closed and bent upwards. He grasps it, and sits down again. A brother of the bride now comes and takes the mirror from the bride, puts it on a palaga, and professes to show her her own reflection in its surface. Then the bridegroom pours a little ghee into her joined hands, to which the bride's brother adds two handfuls of paddy from the winnowing basket, and the bridegroom then brushes the paddy from her hands into the fire. This is called the Lajahomam. At its conclusion, bride and bridegroom perform a pradakshinam round the fire, passing outside the water-pot but not the grindstone and fan. Next comes the important piece of ceremonial called Asmarohanam, symbolising immutability. The bride and bridegroom stand west of the grindstones, and the bridegroom, taking her feet one by one, places them on the stones, and then grasps feet and stones with both hands. Lajahomam, pradakshinam, and asmarohanam are each repeated thrice. Then comes the rite called Saptapadi or seven paces. The bridegroom leads his bride seven steps towards the north-east, touching her right foot with his right hand as he does so. They then pass between the grindstones and the fire, and seat themselves on the west of the earthen pot facing east, the bride behind the bridegroom; and the latter performs a somewhat acrobatic feat which it must be difficult to invest with any dignity. He bends backwards, supporting himself by placing the palms of his hands on the ground behind him, until he can touch with the top of his head that of the bride, who bends forward to facilitate the process. After this, the bridegroom sprinkles himself and the bride with water from the earthen pot. They then return to their seats west of the altar, and face north, ostensibly looking at the pole star (Druvan), the star Arundati, and the Seven Rishis (Ursa Major), which the bridegroom is supposed to point out to the bride, while he teaches her a short mantram invoking the blessing of long life on her husband. The bridegroom then makes two oblations, pouring ghee on the sacred fire, the first called Sishtakralhomam and the second Darmmihomam. He then places on the fire the paridhis, the remaining udhmams and dharba grass, and the rest of the ghee. A start is then made for the bridegroom's illam, the bridegroom carrying the chamatha branch used in making the aupasana agni in the bride's house. On arrival, an altar is prepared in much the same manner as before, the chamatha branch is ignited, and darbha and ghee are offered. The bride and bridegroom next spend a few moments closeted in the same room, she lying on a skin spread over a new cloth on the floor, and he sitting on an amana palaga. In the evening, aupasana homam, or offerings of chamatha in the sacred fire, and Vaisyadeva homam, or offerings of boiled rice, are made. These, which are known as a second homam, may be postponed till next afternoon, if there is no time for them on the actual wedding day. They have to be performed daily for ten months. The first three days on which these homams are performed (viz., the wedding day and the two following it, or the three days after the wedding as the case may be) are regarded as days of mourning (diksha), and clothes are not changed. On the fourth day, the newly married couple have an oil-bath, and the diksha is considered to be at an end. After the usual homams and worship of Ganapathi, the bride is led to the bridal chamber at an auspicious moment. Her husband joins her, carrying two garlands of jasmine, one of which he puts on the lamp placed in the south-east corner of the room, and one round his wife's neck. He then smears the upper part of her body with the ointment known as chanthu, and she herself smears the lower part. Tum vir penem suum fæminæ ad partes pudendas admovit, vestibus scilicet haud remotis. They then bathe and change their clothes, and sit near each other, the wife screened behind an umbrella. Her husband gives her water, and after some further rites they eat from the same plantain leaf. Actual cohabitation commences from that night. The pair are conducted to the bridal chamber by the Vadhiyar. The nuptial couch is but a grass mat or a common country blanket covered with a white sheet, with a little ridge of rice and paddy signifying plenty around the edges. The final ceremony is the homam called stalipagam. It is performed on the day after the first full moon day after the second homam. If the moon is at the full 3/4 nazhiga before sunset or earlier, the ceremony may be performed on the full moon day itself."

It will have been seen already that the Nambutiris are not strict monogamists. Some stated that a man may have four wives, and that the same ceremony as that described must be performed for wedding all four wives. Moreover, there is no restriction to the number of Nayar women, with whom a man may be associated.

Hamilton, writing concerning Malabar at the end of the seventeenth and beginning of the eighteenth century, says that "when the Zamorin marries, he must not cohabit with his bride till the Nambutiri or chief priest has enjoyed her, and, if he pleases, may have three nights of her company, because the first fruit of her nuptials must be an holy oblation to the god he worships: and some of the nobles are so complaisant as to allow the clergy the same tribute; but the common people cannot have that compliment paid to them, but are forced to supply the priest's place themselves."

Of ceremonies after marriage, and those performed during pregnancy and subsequent to the birth of a child, the following may be noted:--