Part 20

_Clo._ Wit, an't be thy will, put me into good fooling! Those wits, that think they have thee, do very oft prove 30 fools; and I, that am sure I lack thee, may pass for a wise man: for what says Quinapalus? 'Better a witty fool than a foolish wit.'

_Enter_ Lady OLIVIA _with_ MALVOLIO.

God bless thee, lady!

_Oli._ Take the fool away. 35

_Clo._ Do you not hear, fellows? Take away the lady.

_Oli._ Go to, you're a dry fool; I'll no more of you: besides, you grow dishonest.

_Clo._ Two faults, madonna, that drink and good counsel will amend: for give the dry fool drink, then is the fool not 40 dry: bid the dishonest man mend himself; if he mend, he is no longer dishonest; if he cannot, let the botcher mend him. Any thing that's mended is but patched: virtue that transgresses is but patched with sin; and sin that amends is but patched with virtue. If that this simple syllogism will serve, 45 so; if it will not, what remedy? As there is no true cuckold but calamity, so beauty's a flower. The lady bade take away the fool; therefore, I say again, take her away.

_Oli._ Sir, I bade them take away you.

_Clo._ Misprision in the highest degree! Lady, cucullus 50 non facit monachum; that's as much to say as I wear not motley in my brain. Good madonna, give me leave to prove you a fool.

_Oli._ Can you do it?

_Clo._ Dexteriously, good madonna. 55

_Oli._ Make your proof.

_Clo._ I must catechize you for it, madonna: good my mouse of virtue, answer me.

_Oli._ Well, sir, for want of other idleness, I 'll bide your proof. 60

_Clo._ Good madonna, why mournest thou?

_Oli._ Good fool, for my brother's death.

_Clo._ I think his soul is in hell, madonna.

_Oli._ I know his soul is in heaven, fool.

_Clo._ The more fool, madonna, to mourn for your brother's 65 soul being in heaven. Take away the fool, gentlemen.

_Oli._ What think you of this fool, Malvolio? doth he not mend?

_Mal._ Yes, and shall do till the pangs of death shake 70 him: infirmity, that decays the wise, doth ever make the better fool.

_Clo._ God send you, sir, a speedy infirmity, for the better increasing your folly! Sir Toby will be sworn that I am no fox; but he will not pass his word for two pence 75 that you are no fool.

_Oli._ How say you to that, Malvolio?

_Mal._ I marvel your ladyship takes delight in such a barren rascal: I saw him put down the other day with an ordinary fool that has no more brain than a stone. Look 80 you now, he's out of his guard already; unless you laugh and minister occasion to him, he is gagged. I protest, I take these wise men, that crow so at these set kind of fools, no better than the fools' zanies.

_Oli._ O, you are sick of self-love, Malvolio, and taste 85 with a distempered appetite. To be generous, guiltless and of free disposition, is to take those things for bird-bolts that you deem cannon-bullets: there is no slander in an allowed fool, though he do nothing but rail; nor no railing in a known discreet man, though he do nothing but reprove. 90

_Clo._ Now Mercury endue thee with leasing, for thou speakest well of fools!

_Re-enter_ MARIA.

_Mar._ Madam, there is at the gate a young gentleman much desires to speak with you.

_Oli._ From the Count Orsino, is it? 95

_Mar._ I know not, madam: 'tis a fair young man, and well attended.

_Oli._ Who of my people hold him in delay?

_Mar._ Sir Toby, madam, your kinsman.

_Oli._ Fetch him off, I pray you; he speaks nothing but 100 madman: fie on him! [_Exit Maria._] Go you, Malvolio: if it be a suit from the count, I am sick, or not at home; what you will, to dismiss it. [_Exit Malvolio._] Now you see, sir, how your fooling grows old, and people dislike it.

_Clo._ Thou hast spoke for us, madonna, as if thy eldest son 105 should be a fool; whose skull Jove cram with brains! for,--here he comes,--one of thy kin has a most weak pia mater.

_Enter_ Sir TOBY.

_Oli._ By mine honour, half drunk. What is he at the gate, cousin?

_Sir To._ A gentleman. 110

_Oli._ A gentleman! what gentleman?

_Sir To._ 'Tis a gentleman here--a plague o' these pickle-herring! How now, sot!

_Clo._ Good Sir Toby!

_Oli._ Cousin, cousin, how have you come so early by 115 this lethargy?

_Sir To._ Lechery! I defy lechery. There's one at the gate.

_Oli._ Ay, marry, what is he?

_Sir To._ Let him be the devil, an he will, I care not: give me faith, say I. Well, it's all one. [_Exit._ 120

_Oli._ What's a drunken man like, fool?

_Clo._ Like a drowned man, a fool and a mad man: one draught above heat makes him a fool; the second mads him; and a third drowns him.

_Oli._ Go thou and seek the crowner, and let him sit o' 125 my coz; for he's in the third degree of drink, he's drowned: go, look after him.

_Clo._ He is but mad yet, madonna; and the fool shall look to the madman. [_Exit._

_Re-enter_ MALVOLIO.

_Mal._ Madam, yond young fellow swears he will speak 130 with you. I told him you were sick; he takes on him to understand so much, and therefore comes to speak with you. I told him you were asleep; he seems to have a foreknowledge of that too, and therefore comes to speak with you. What is to be said to him, lady? he's fortified 135 against any denial.

_Oli._ Tell him he shall not speak with me.

_Mal._ Has been told so; and he says, he'll stand at your door like a sheriff's post, and be the supporter to a bench, but he'll speak with you. 140

_Oli._ What kind o' man is he?

_Mal._ Why, of mankind.

_Oli._ What manner of man?

_Mal._ Of very ill manner; he'll speak with you, will you or no. 145

_Oli._ Of what personage and years is he?

_Mal._ Not yet old enough for a man, nor young enough for a boy; as a squash is before 'tis a peascod, or a codling when 'tis almost an apple: 'tis with him in standing water, between boy and man. He is very well-favoured and he 150 speaks very shrewishly; one would think his mother's milk were scarce out of him.

_Oli._ Let him approach: call in my gentlewoman.

_Mal._ Gentlewoman, my lady calls. [_Exit._

_Re-enter_ MARIA.

_Oli._ Give me my veil: come, throw it o'er my face. 155 We'll once more hear Orsino's embassy.

_Enter_ VIOLA, _and_ Attendants.

_Vio._ The honourable lady of the house, which is she?

_Oli._ Speak to me; I shall answer for her. Your will?

_Vio._ Most radiant, exquisite and unmatchable beauty,--I pray you, tell me if this be the lady of the house, for I 160 never saw her: I would be loath to cast away my speech, for besides that it is excellently well penned, I have taken great pains to con it. Good beauties, let me sustain no scorn; I am very comptible, even to the least sinister usage.

_Oli._ Whence came you, sir? 165

_Vio._ I can say little more than I have studied, and that question's out of my part. Good gentle one, give me modest assurance if you be the lady of the house, that I may proceed in my speech.

_Oli._ Are you a comedian? 170

_Vio._ No, my profound heart: and yet, by the very fangs of malice I swear, I am not that I play. Are you the lady of the house?

_Oli._ If I do not usurp myself, I am.

_Vio._ Most certain, if you are she, you do usurp your-self; 175 for what is yours to bestow is not yours to reserve. But this is from my commission: I will on with my speech in your praise, and then show you the heart of my message.

_Oli._ Come to what is important in't: I forgive you the praise. 180

_Vio._ Alas, I took great pains to study it, and 'tis poetical.

_Oli._ It is the more like to be feigned: I pray you, keep it in. I heard you were saucy at my gates, and allowed your approach rather to wonder at you than to hear you. 185 If you be not mad, be gone; if you have reason, be brief: 'tis not that time of moon with me to make one in so skipping a dialogue.

_Mar._ Will you hoist sail, sir? here lies your way.

_Vio._ No, good swabber; I am to hull here a little 190 longer. Some mollification for your giant, sweet lady. Tell me your mind: I am a messenger.

_Oli._ Sure, you have some hideous matter to deliver, when the courtesy of it is so fearful. Speak your office.

_Vio._ It alone concerns your ear. I bring no overture 195 of war, no taxation of homage: I hold the olive in my hand; my words are as full of peace as matter.

_Oli._ Yet you began rudely. What are you? what would you?

_Vio._ The rudeness that hath appeared in me have I 200 learned from my entertainment. What I am, and what I would, are as secret as maidenhead; to your ears, divinity, to any other's, profanation.

_Oli._ Give us the place alone: we will hear this divinity. [_Exeunt Maria and Attendants._] Now, sir, what is your text? 205

_Vio._ Most sweet lady,--

_Oli._ A comfortable doctrine, and much may be said of it. Where lies your text?

_Vio._ In Orsino's bosom.

_Oli._ In his bosom! In what chapter of his bosom? 210

_Vio._ To answer by the method, in the first of his heart.

_Oli._ O, I have read it: it is heresy. Have you no more to say?

_Vio._ Good madam, let me see your face.

_Oli._ Have you any commission from your lord to negotiate 215 with my face? You are now out of your text: but we will draw the curtain and show you the picture. Look you, sir, such a one I was this present: is't not well done? [_Unveiling._

_Vio._ Excellently done, if God did all.

_Oli._ 'Tis in grain, sir; 'twill endure wind and weather. 220

_Vio._ 'Tis beauty truly blent, whose red and white Nature's own sweet and cunning hand laid on: Lady, you are the cruell'st she alive, If you will lead these graces to the grave And leave the world no copy. 225

_Oli._ O, sir, I will not be so hard-hearted; I will give out divers schedules of my beauty: it shall be inventoried, and every particle and utensil labelled to my will: as, item, two lips, indifferent red; item, two grey eyes, with lids to them; item, one neck, one chin, and so forth. Were 230 you sent hither to praise me?

_Vio._ I see you what you are, you are too proud; But, if you were the devil, you are fair. My lord and master loves you: O, such love Could be but recompensed, though you were crown'd 235 The nonpareil of beauty!

_Oli._ How does he love me?

_Vio._ With adorations, fertile tears, With groans that thunder love, with sighs of fire.

_Oli._ Your lord does know my mind; I cannot love him: Yet I suppose him virtuous, know him noble, 240 Of great estate, of fresh and stainless youth; In voices well divulged, free, learn'd and valiant; And in dimension and the shape of nature A gracious person: but yet I cannot love him; He might have took his answer long ago. 245

_Vio._ If I did love you in my master's flame, With such a suffering, such a deadly life, In your denial I would find no sense; I would not understand it.

_Oli._ Why, what would you?

_Vio._ Make me a willow cabin at your gate, 250 And call upon my soul within the house; Write loyal cantons of contemned love And sing them loud even in the dead of night; Halloo your name to the reverberate hills And make the babbling gossip of the air 255 Cry out 'Olivia!' O, you should not rest Between the elements of air and earth, But you should pity me!

_Oli._ You might do much. What is your parentage?

_Vio._ Above my fortunes, yet my state is well: 260 I am a gentleman.

_Oli._ Get you to your lord; I cannot love him: let him send no more; Unless, perchance, you come to me again, To tell me how he takes it. Fare you well: I thank you for your pains: spend this for me. 265

_Vio._ I am no fee'd post, lady; keep your purse: My master, not myself, lacks recompense. Love make his heart of flint that you shall love; And let your fervour, like my master's, be Placed in contempt! Farewell, fair cruelty. [_Exit._ 270

_Oli._ 'What is your parentage?' 'Above my fortunes, yet my state is well: I am a gentleman.' I'll be sworn thou art; Thy tongue, thy face, thy limbs, actions, and spirit, Do give thee five-fold blazon: not too fast: soft, soft! 275 Unless the master were the man. How now! Even so quickly may one catch the plague? Methinks I feel this youth's perfections With an invisible and subtle stealth To creep in at mine eyes. Well, let it be. 280 What ho, Malvolio!

_Re-enter_ MALVOLIO.

_Mal._ Here, madam, at your service.

_Oli._ Run after that same peevish messenger, The county's man: he left this ring behind him, Would I or not: tell him I'll none of it. Desire him not to flatter with his lord, 285 Nor hold him up with hopes; I am not for him: If that the youth will come this way to-morrow, I'll give him reasons for't: hie thee, Malvolio.

_Mal._ Madam, I will. [_Exit._

_Oli._ I do I know not what, and fear to find 290 Mine eye too great a flatterer for my mind. Fate, show thy force: ourselves we do not owe; What is decreed must be, and be this so. [_Exit_.

LINENOTES:

## SCENE V.] SCENE VI. Pope.

OLIVIA'S house.] Rowe.

[5] _to fear_] _fear_ F3 F4.

_colours_] _collars_ Anon. conj.

[8] _lenten_] Rowe. _lenton_ Ff.

[16] _to be_] F1. _be_ F2 F3 F4.

[18] _Many_] _Marry_, Theobald.

[19] _turning away_] _turning o' hay_ Smith conj. _turning of whey_ Letherland conj.

[20, 28] _You_] _Your_ F2.

[23] _gaskins_] _gaskings_ F4.

[28] [Exit.] Pope. om. Ff.

[29] SCENE VII. Pope.

_an't_] Hanmer. _and 't_ Ff.

_good_] _a good_ Warburton.

[34] Enter ...] Ff (after line 28). Enter O. attended. Capell.

[37] _you're_] _y'are_ Ff.

[39] _madonna_] _Madona_ Ff., and passim.

[46] _cuckold_] _counsellor_ Hanmer.

[51] _to say as I wear_] _to say, as I were_ F4. _as to say, as I were_ Rowe (ed. 1). _as to say, I wear_ Id. (ed. 2).

[55] _Dexteriously_] _Dexterously_ F4.

[58] _mouse_] _muse_ Anon. conj.

_answer me_] _answer_ F3 F4.

[59] _bide_] _abide_ Steevens (1785).

[65] _fool_] F1 F2. _fool you_ F3 F4.

[71, 72] _the better_] Ff. _better the_ Rowe (ed. 2).

[80] _brain_] _brains_ F3 F4.

[83] _these_] _those_ Hanmer.

_wise men_] F3 F4. _wisemen_ F1 F2.

[84] _no better_] _to be no better_ Capell.

[86] _guiltless_] F3 F4. _guitlesse_ F1 F2. _guileless_ ANON. conj.

[91] _leasing_] _learning_ Rowe. _pleasing_ Warburton.

[93] Re-enter M.] Enter M. Ff.

[95, 102] _Count_] _Duke_ Hanmer.

[99] _kinsman_] _uncle_ Rowe (ed. 2).

[101] Exit Maria] Capell.

[103] Exit Malvolio] Ff.

_Now you_] _Now_ Rowe.

[106, 107] _for,--here he comes_,--] Edd. _for here he comes_ Ff. _for here comes_ Rowe (ed. 2).

[107] _has_] _that has_ Collier MS.

[108] SCENE VIII. Pope.

Enter ...] Ff (after _comes_, line 107).

[109] _cousin_] _uncle_ Rowe (ed. 2).

[112] _gentleman here_--] Steevens. _gentleman heere._ F1. _gentleman here._ F2 F3 F4. _gentleman. Here_,--[belches.] Theobald. _gentleman-heir_ Warburton. _gentleman_:--[hiccups.] Capell.

[113] _herring_] _herrings_ Malone.

[115] _Cousin, cousin_] _Uncle, uncle_ Rowe.

[119] _an_] Hanmer. _and_ Ff.

[125] _crowner_] _coroner_ Rowe.

[126] _coz_] _uncle_ Rowe (ed. 2). _cousin_ Capell conj.

[129] Exit.] Exit Clown. Rowe.

Re-enter M.] Enter M. Ff.

[130] _yond_] Ff. _you'_ Capell.

[138] _Has_] _Ha's_ Ff. _He has_ Pope.

[139] _and be_] _or be_ Hanmer.

_to_] _of_ Reed (1803).

[141] _o'_] _of_ Steevens.

[144] _manner_] F1 F2. _manners_ F3 F4.

[149] _in_] _e'en_ Capell.

[155] SCENE IX. Pope.

Re-enter M.] Enter M. Ff.

[157] VIOLA] VIOLENTA. F1.

... and Attendants.] Edd. om.

[164] _comptible_] _prompt_ Hanmer. _domptable_ Mason conj.

[169] _my_] om. F3 F4.

[172] _fangs_] _phangs_ Ff. _pangs_ Rowe (ed. 1).

[184] _and_] _and I_ Pope.

[186] _not mad_] _mad_ Rann (Mason conj.). _but mad_ Collier (ed. 2, Staunton conj.).

[187] _that time of moon_] Ff. _the time of the moon_ Rowe. _that time of the moon_ Pope.

[192] _Tell ... messenger_] Oli. _Tell ... mind._ Vio. _I ... messenger_ Hanmer (Warburton). See note (IV).

[196] _taxation_] F1 F2 F3. _taxations_ F4.

_olive_] Rowe. _Olyffe_ F1 F2 F3. _Oliff_ F4.

[202] _secret as maidenhead_] _sacred as maidhood_ Theobald conj.

_maidenhead_] F1. _a maiden-heard_ F2. _a maidenhead_ F3 F4. _maidenhood_ Collier MS.

[203] _other's_] Pope (ed. 2). _others_ Ff.

[205] Exeunt M. and Attendants.] Capell. Exit M. Rowe.

[208] _your text_] _the text_ Rowe.

[218] _such ... is't_] _such a one I wear this present: is't_ Theobald (Warburton). _such a one I was. This presence, is't_ Steevens conj. _such as once I was, this presents: is't_ Rann (Mason conj). _such a one I was, this presents_ Becket conj. _such a one as I was this presents, is't_ Jackson conj. _such a one as I was this present: is't_ Boswell. _such a one I was as this presents: is't_ Singer conj. _such a one I am at this present: is't_ Collier MS.

[Unveiling.] Rowe.

[231] _praise_] '_praise_ Steevens (Malone).

[235] _Could_] _Should_ Collier MS.

[237] _adorations, fertile_] _adorations, fertill_ Ff. _adorations, with fertile_ Pope. _adoration's fertile_ Rann. See note (V).

[244] _but_] om. Pope.

[249] _would you?_] _would you do?_ Rowe.

[252] _cantons_] _cantos_ Rowe (ed. 2). _canzons_ Capell.

[254] _Halloo_] _Hallow_ F1. _Hollaw_ F2. _Hollow_ F3 F4.

_reverberate_] _reverberant_ Theobald.

[258, 259] _You ... parentage._] As one line in Capell.

[275] _soft, soft!_] _soft;_ Capell.

[276] _master were the man_] _man the master were_ Hanmer, who ends lines

[275-278] at fast ... _were_ ... _catch_ ... _perfections_.

[281] Re-enter M.] Enter M. Ff.

[283] _county's_] Capell. _Countes_ F1. _Counts_ F2 F3 F4. _Duke's_ Rowe.

_left_] _left here_ Hanmer.

[288] _reasons for't: hie thee_] F1. _reasons for't: hye thee_ F2. _reasons for't by thee_ F3. _reason for't by thee_ F4. _reason for't._ _Hye thee_ Hanmer.

[292] _owe_] _know_ Long MS.

[293] [Exit] Rowe. Finis, Actus primus. F1. Finis, Actus primi. F2 F3 F4.

## ACT II.

## SCENE I. _The sea-coast._

_Enter_ ANTONIO _and_ SEBASTIAN.

_Ant._ Will you stay no longer? nor will you not that I go with you?

_Seb._ By your patience, no. My stars shine darkly over me: the malignancy of my fate might perhaps distemper yours; therefore I shall crave of you your leave that I may 5 bear my evils alone: it were a bad recompense for your love, to lay any of them on you.

_Ant._ Let me yet know of you whither you are bound.

_Seb._ No, sooth, sir: my determinate voyage is mere extravagancy. But I perceive in you so excellent a touch 10 of modesty, that you will not extort from me what I am willing to keep in; therefore it charges me in manners the rather to express myself. You must know of me then, Antonio, my name is Sebastian, which I called Roderigo. My father was that Sebastian of Messaline, whom I know 15 you have heard of. He left behind him myself and a sister, both born in an hour: if the heavens had been pleased, would we had so ended! but you, sir, altered that; for some hour before you took me from the breach of the sea was my sister drowned. 20

_Ant._ Alas the day!

_Seb._ A lady, sir, though it was said she much resembled me, was yet of many accounted beautiful: but, though I could not with such estimable wonder overfar believe that, yet thus far I will boldly publish her; she bore a 25 mind that envy could not but call fair. She is drowned already, sir, with salt water, though I seem to drown her remembrance again with more.

_Ant._ Pardon me, sir, your bad entertainment.

_Seb._ O good Antonio, forgive me your trouble. 30

_Ant._ If you will not murder me for my love, let me be your servant.

_Seb._ If you will not undo what you have done, that is, kill him whom you have recovered, desire it not. Fare ye well at once: my bosom is full of kindness, and I am yet 35 so near the manners of my mother, that upon the least occasion more mine eyes will tell tales of me. I am bound to the Count Orsino's court: farewell. [_Exit._

_Ant._ The gentleness of all the gods go with thee! I have many enemies in Orsino's court, 40 Else would I very shortly see thee there. But, come what may, I do adore thee so, That danger shall seem sport, and I will go. [_Exit._

LINENOTES:

## SCENE I. The sea-coast.] Capell. The street. Rowe.

[1, 2] _longer? ... with you?_] _longer: ... with you._ F.

[5] _I shall crave_] _I crave_ Rowe.

[9] _sooth_] _in sooth_ Johnson. _'sooth_ Capell.

[14] _Roderigo_] Collier. _Rodorigo_ Ff.

[15] _Messaline_] _Metelin_ Hanmer. _Mitylene_ Capell conj.

[17] _an_] F1 F2. _one_ F3 F4.

[19] _hour_] _houre_ F1 F2. _houres_ F3. _hours_ F4.

[19] _breach_] _beach_ Grey conj.

[22] _though_] _who, tho'_ Hanmer.

[24] _not ... overfar_] _not overfar_ Warburton conj. _not with self-estimation wander so far_ Collier (Collier MS.). _not with such estimators wander overfar to_ Singer MS. _not with such estimate wander overfar to_ Bailey conj.

_with ... wonder_] Omit as spurious. Warburton conj.

[26] _envy could not but_] _envy itself would_ Capell conj.

[38] _Count_] _Duke_ Rowe.

[40] _many_] F1 F2. _made_ F3 F4.

## SCENE II. _A street._

_Enter_ VIOLA, MALVOLIO _following_.

_Mal._ Were not you even now with the Countess Olivia?

_Vio._ Even now, sir; on a moderate pace I have since arrived but hither.

_Mal._ She returns this ring to you, sir: you might have saved me my pains, to have taken it away yourself. She 5 adds, moreover, that you should put your lord into a desperate assurance she will none of him: and one thing more, that you be never so hardy to come again in his affairs, unless it be to report your lord's taking of this. Receive it so. 10

_Vio._ She took the ring of me: I'll none of it.

_Mal._ Come, sir, you peevishly threw it to her; and her will is, it should be so returned: if it be worth stooping for, there it lies in your eye; if not, be it his that finds it. [_Exit._