Part 22

_Mar._ Get ye all three into the box-tree: Malvolio's coming down this walk: he has been yonder i' the sun practising behaviour to his own shadow this half hour: observe 15 him, for the love of mockery; for I know this letter will make a contemplative idiot of him. Close, in the name of jesting! Lie thou there [_throws down a letter_]; for here comes the trout that must be caught with tickling. [_Exit._ 20

_Enter_ MALVOLIO.

_Mal._ 'Tis but fortune; all is fortune. Maria once told me she did affect me: and I have heard herself come thus near, that, should she fancy, it should be one of my complexion. Besides, she uses me with a more exalted respect than any one else that follows her. What should I think 25 on't?

_Sir To._ Here's an overweening rogue!

_Fab._ O, peace! Contemplation makes a rare turkey-cock of him: how he jets under his advanced plumes!

_Sir And._ 'Slight, I could so beat the rogue! 30

_Sir To._ Peace, I say.

_Mal._ To be Count Malvolio!

_Sir To._ Ah, rogue!

_Sir And._ Pistol him, pistol him.

_Sir To._ Peace, peace! 35

_Mal._ There is example for't; the lady of the Strachy married the yeoman of the wardrobe.

_Sir And._ Fie on him, Jezebel!

_Fab._ O, peace! now he's deeply in: look how imagination blows him. 40

_Mal._ Having been three months married to her, sitting in my state,--

_Sir To._ O, for a stone-bow, to hit him in the eye!

_Mal._ Calling my officers about me, in my branched velvet gown; having come from a day-bed, where I have 45 left Olivia sleeping,--

_Sir To._ Fire and brimstone!

_Fab._ O, peace, peace!

_Mal._ And then to have the humour of state; and after a demure travel of regard, telling them I know my place as I 50 would they should do theirs, to ask for my kinsman Toby,--

_Sir To._ Bolts and shackles!

_Fab._ O, peace, peace, peace! now, now.

_Mal._ Seven of my people, with an obedient start, make out for him: I frown the while; and perchance wind 55 up my watch, or play with my--some rich jewel. Toby approaches; courtesies there to me,--

_Sir To._ Shall this fellow live?

_Fab._ Though our silence be drawn from us with cars, yet peace. 60

_Mal._ I extend my hand to him thus, quenching my familiar smile with an austere regard of control,--

_Sir To._ And does not Toby take you a blow o' the lips then?

_Mal._ Saying, 'Cousin Toby, my fortunes having cast 65 me on your niece give me this prerogative of speech,'--

_Sir To._ What, what?

_Mal._ 'You must amend your drunkenness.'

_Sir To._ Out, scab!

_Fab._ Nay, patience, or we break the sinews of our plot. 70

_Mal._ 'Besides, you waste the treasure of your time with a foolish knight,'--

_Sir And._ That's me, I warrant you.

_Mal._ 'One Sir Andrew,'--

_Sir And._ I knew 'twas I; for many do call me fool. 75

_Mal._ What employment have we here? [_Taking up the letter._

_Fab._ Now is the woodcock near the gin.

_Sir To._ O, peace! and the spirit of humours intimate reading aloud to him!

_Mal._ By my life, this is my lady's hand: these be her 80 very C's, her U's and her T's; and thus makes she her great P's. It is, in contempt of question, her hand.

_Sir And._ Her C's, her U's and her T's: why that?

_Mal._ [_reads_] To the unknown beloved, this, and my good wishes:--her very phrases! By your leave, wax. Soft! 85 and the impressure her Lucrece, with which she uses to seal: 'tis my lady. To whom should this be?

_Fab._ This wins him, liver and all.

_Mal._ [_reads_] Jove knows I love: But who? 90 Lips, do not move; No man must know. 'No man must know.' What follows? the numbers altered! 'No man must know:' if this should be thee, Malvolio?

_Sir To._ Marry, hang thee, brock! 95

_Mal._ [_reads_] I may command where I adore; But silence, like a Lucrece knife, With bloodless stroke my heart doth gore: M, O, A, I, doth sway my life.

_Fab._ A fustian riddle! 100

_Sir To._ Excellent wench, say I.

_Mal._ 'M, O, A, I, doth sway my life.' Nay, but first, let me see, let me see, let me see.

_Fab._ What dish o' poison has she dressed him!

_Sir To._ And with what wing the staniel checks at it! 105

_Mal._ 'I may command where I adore.' Why, she may command me: I serve her; she is my lady. Why, this is evident to any formal capacity; there is no obstruction in this: and the end,--what should that alphabetical position portend? If I could make that resemble something 110 in me,--Softly! M, O, A, I,--

_Sir To._ O, ay, make up that: he is now at a cold scent.

_Fab._ Sowter will cry upon't for all this, though it be as rank as a fox.

_Mal._ M,--Malvolio; M,--why, that begins my name. 115

_Fab._ Did not I say he would work it out? the cur is excellent at faults.

_Mal._ M,--but then there is no consonancy in the sequel; that suffers under probation: A should follow, but O does.

_Fab._ And O shall end, I hope. 120

_Sir To._ Ay, or I'll cudgel him, and make him cry O!

_Mal._ And then I comes behind.

_Fab._ Ay, an you had any eye behind you, you might see more detraction at your heels than fortunes before you.

_Mal._ M, O, A, I; this simulation is not as the former: 125 and yet, to crush this a little, it would bow to me, for every one of these letters are in my name. Soft! here follows prose.

[_Reads_] If this fall into thy hand, revolve. In my stars I am above thee; but be not afraid of greatness: some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon 'em. Thy Fates open 130 their hands; let thy blood and spirit embrace them; and, to inure thyself to what thou art like to be, cast thy humble slough and appear fresh. Be opposite with a kinsman, surly with servants; let thy tongue tang arguments of state; put thyself into the trick of singularity: she thus advises thee that sighs for thee. Remember who 135 commended thy yellow stockings, and wished to see thee ever cross-gartered: I say, remember. Go to, thou art made, if thou desirest to be so; if not, let me see thee a steward still, the fellow of servants, and not worthy to touch Fortune's fingers. Farewell. She that would alter services with thee, 140

THE FORTUNATE-UNHAPPY.

Daylight and champain discovers not more: this is open. I will be proud, I will read politic authors, I will baffle Sir Toby, I will wash off gross acquaintance, I will be point-devise the very man. I do not now fool myself, to let imagination 145 jade me; for every reason excites to this, that my lady loves me. She did commend my yellow stockings of late, she did praise my leg being cross-gartered; and in this she manifests herself to my love, and with a kind of injunction drives me to these habits of her liking. I thank my stars I 150 am happy. I will be strange, stout, in yellow stockings, and cross-gartered, even with the swiftness of putting on. Jove and my stars be praised! Here is yet a postscript.

[_Reads_] Thou canst not choose but know who I am. If thou entertainest my love, let it appear in thy smiling; thy smiles become 155 thee well; therefore in my presence still smile, dear my sweet, I prithee.

Jove, I thank thee: I will smile; I will do every thing that thou wilt have me. [_Exit._

_Fab._ I will not give my part of this sport for a pension of thousands to be paid from the Sophy. 160

_Sir To._ I could marry this wench for this device.

_Sir And._ So could I too.

_Sir To._ And ask no other dowry with her but such another jest.

_Sir And._ Nor I neither. 165

_Fab._ Here comes my noble gull-catcher.

_Re-enter_ MARIA.

_Sir To._ Wilt thou set thy foot o' my neck?

_Sir And._ Or o' mine either?

_Sir To._ Shall I play my freedom at tray-trip, and become thy bond-slave? 170

_Sir And._ I' faith, or I either?

_Sir To._ Why, thou hast put him in such a dream, that when the image of it leaves him he must run mad.

_Mar._ Nay, but say true; does it work upon him?

_Sir To._ Like aqua-vitæ with a midwife. 175

_Mar._ If you will then see the fruits of the sport, mark his first approach before my lady: he will come to her in yellow stockings, and 'tis a colour she abhors, and cross-gartered, a fashion she detests; and he will smile upon her, which will now be so unsuitable to her disposition, being 180 addicted to a melancholy as she is, that it cannot but turn him into a notable contempt. If you will see it, follow me.

_Sir To._ To the gates of Tartar, thou most excellent devil of wit!

_Sir And._ I'll make one too. [_Exeunt._ 185

LINENOTES:

## SCENE V.] SCENE VII. Pope.

OLIVIA'S garden.] Pope.

[3] _boiled_] _broiled_ Grey conj.

[7] _O'_] _Of_ Rowe.

[10] _An_] Pope. _And_ Ff.

_it is_] _'tis_ Rowe (ed. 1). _it's_ Id. (ed. 2).

[11] Enter M.] Ff (after line 10).

[12] _metal_] Malone. _Mettle_ F1. _Nettle_ F2 F3 F4.

[18] [Men hide themselves. Capell.

[throws down a letter] Theobald.

[21] SCENE VIII. Pope.

[30] _'Slight_] F3 F4. _Slight_ F1 F2. _'Slife_ Rowe.

[31, 35] Sir To.] Fab. Edd. conj.

[36] _Strachy_] _Stratarch_ Hanmer. _Trachy_ Warburton. _Trachyne_ Capell conj. _Straccio_ Smith conj. _Starchy_ Steevens conj. _Stitchery_ Becket conj. _Stratico_ R.P. Knight conj. _Astrakhan_ C. Knight conj. _Strozzi_ Collier conj. _Stracci_ Lloyd conj. _Sophy_ or _Saucery_ or _Satrape_ Anon. apud Halliwell conj.

[37] _the wardrobe_] _her wardrobe_ Capell conj.

[38] _him_] _her_ Lloyd conj.

[49] _humour_] _honour_ Collier MS.

[51] _kinsman_] _uncle_ Rowe (ed. 2).

[56] _my--some_] Collier. _my some_ F1 F2. _some_ F3 F4.

[59] _Though ... cars_] _Silence! though our ears be withdrawn from us_ Becket conj.

_with cars_] F1. _with cares_ F2 F3 F4. _by th' ears_ Hanmer. _with carts_ Johnson conj. _with cables_ Tyrwhitt conj. _with cats_ Jackson conj. _with tears_ Singer conj. _with racks_ S. Walker conj. _with cords_ Grant White. _with_ _screws_ Bailey conj. _with cart-ropes_ Hunter conj. _with curs_ Anon. conj.

[65] _Cousin_] Ff. _Uncle_ Rowe (ed. 2).

[76] _employment_] _implement_ Hanmer (Theobald conj.).

[Taking....] Taking up a letter. Rowe.

[78] _and_] _now_ Rowe.

[84, 89, 96] [reads] Capell.

[85] _Soft!_] Rowe. _Soft,_ Ff.

[89-92] _Jove ... know_] As prose in Ff.

[90] _But who?_] _Alas! but who?_ Hanmer.

[91] _Lips,_] Edd. (Capell MS.). _Lips_ Ff.

[93] _numbers altered!_] Capell. _numbers alter'd:_ Ff. _number's alter'd_ Rowe (ed. 2). _numbers alter_ Hanmer.

[97] _Lucrece knife_] Rowe (ed. 2). _Lucresse knife_ F1 F2. _Lucress wife_ F3 F4. _Lucrece' knife_ Dyce (S. Walker conj.).

[96-99] _I may ... my life_] As in Hanmer. Printed as two lines in Ff.

[103] _let me see, let me see, let me see_] _let me see, let me see_ F3 F4.

[104] _o'_] Dyce. _a_ F1 F2. _of_ F3 F4.

[105] _staniel_] Hanmer. _stallion_ Ff. _falcon_ Collier MS.

[110] _portend? ... me,--_] Capell. _portend, ... me?_ Ff. _portend. ... me?_ Rowe (ed. 1). _portend? ... me?_ Id. (ed. 2). _portend? ... me._ Hanmer.

[112] _make up_] _make out_ Hanmer. _take up_ Anon. conj.

[113] _be_] _ben't_ Hanmer.

[115] _M, Malvolio ... name_] _M,-- why ... name. M,--Malvolio!_ or _M,--M,--M,--why ... name_ Edd. conj.

[118] _sequel;_] Rowe. _sequel_ Ff.

[119] _suffers_] _suffices_ Anon. conj.

[123] _an_] Hanmer. _and_ Ff. _and if_ Capell conj.

[125] _simulation_] _similation_ Capell conj. MS.

[126] _bow to me_] F1 F2. _bow me_ F3 F4.

[127] _are_] _is_ Rowe (ed. 2).

[128] [Reads] Capell.

[129] _born_] Rowe. _become_ Ff.

_achieve_] _atcheeues_ F1. See note (X).

[130] _thrust upon'em_] _thrust uppon em_ F1. _thrust upon em_ F2. _put upon em_ F3. _put upon them_ F4. _thrust upon them_ Rowe (ed. 2).

[131, 132] _them; ... be,_] _them_, ... _be:_ F1 F2 F3. _them_, ... _be;_ F4.

[134] _tang_] Ff. _tang with_ Hanmer.

[141, 142] _thee,_ THE FORTUNATE-UNHAPPY. Daylight] Capell. _thee, the fortunate unhappy daylight_ Ff (_tht_ F1). _thee. The fortunate and happy daylight_ Rowe. _thee the fortunate and happy. Daylight_ Hanmer.

[142] _champain_] Dyce. _champian_ F1 F2. _champion_ F3 F4. _champaign_ Collier (ed. 1).

_discovers not_] Ff. _discovers no_ Pope, _discover no_ Hanmer.

[143] _politic_] _pollticke_ F1.

[144, 145] _point-devise_] _point devise_ Ff. _point-de-vice_ Steevens.

[145] _not now_] F1. _now_ F2 F3 F4. _not_ Hanmer.

[146] _every_] _very_ Capell conj.

[149] _kind of_] _kind_ Capell conj.

[151] _be strange, stout_] _bestir me, strut_ Anon. conj.

_stockings_] _stocking_ F2.

[154] [Reads] Collier.

[156] _dear_] _deero_ F1.

[162] _So_] _And so_ Hanmer.

[165] SCENE IX. Pope.

[167] Re-enter M.] Enter M. Ff (after line 164).

[169] _at_] _at a_ F3 F4.

[181] _a melancholy_] _melancholy_ F3 F4.

[183] _gates of Tartar_] _gates Tartar_ F4. _gates, Tartar_ Rowe. _gates of Tartarus_ Collier MS.

[185] [Exeunt.] Exeunt. Finis Actus secundus. F1. Exeunt. Finis Actus secundi. F2 F3 F4.

## ACT III.

## SCENE I. OLIVIA'S _garden_.

_Enter_ VIOLA, _and_ Clown _with a tabor_.

_Vio._ Save thee, friend, and thy music: dost thou live by thy tabor?

_Clo._ No, sir, I live by the church.

_Vio._ Art thou a churchman?

_Clo._ No such matter, sir: I do live by the church; for I 5 do live at my house, and my house doth stand by the church.

_Vio._ So thou mayst say, the king lies by a beggar, if a beggar dwell near him; or, the church stands by thy tabor, if thy tabor stand by the church.

_Clo._ You have said, sir. To see this age! A sentence 10 is but a cheveril glove to a good wit: how quickly the wrong side may be turned outward!

_Vio._ Nay, that's certain; they that dally nicely with words may quickly make them wanton.

_Clo._ I would, therefore, my sister had had no name, sir. 15

_Vio._ Why, man?

_Clo._ Why, sir, her name's a word; and to dally with that word might make my sister wanton. But indeed words are very rascals since bonds disgraced them.

_Vio._ Thy reason, man? 20

_Clo._ Troth, sir, I can yield you none without words; and words are grown so false, I am loath to prove reason with them.

_Vio._ I warrant thou art a merry fellow and carest for nothing. 25

_Clo._ Not so, sir, I do care for something; but in my conscience, sir, I do not care for you: if that be to care for nothing, sir, I would it would make you invisible.

_Vio._ Art not thou the Lady Olivia's fool?

_Clo._ No, indeed, sir; the Lady Olivia has no folly: she 30 will keep no fool, sir, till she be married; and fools are as like husbands as pilchards are to herrings; the husband's the bigger: I am indeed not her fool, but her corrupter of words.

_Vio._ I saw thee late at the Count Orsino's. 35

_Clo._ Foolery, sir, does walk about the orb like the sun, it shines every where. I would be sorry, sir, but the fool should be as oft with your master as with my mistress: I think I saw your wisdom there.

_Vio._ Nay, an thou pass upon me, I'll no more with 40 thee. Hold, there's expenses for thee.

_Clo._ Now Jove, in his next commodity of hair, send thee a beard!

_Vio._ By my troth, I'll tell thee, I am almost sick for one; [_Aside_] though I would not have it grow on my chin. 45 Is thy lady within?

_Clo._ Would not a pair of these have bred, sir?

_Vio._ Yes, being kept together and put to use.

_Clo._ I would play Lord Pandarus of Phrygia, sir, to bring a Cressida to this Troilus. 50

_Vio._ I understand you, sir; 'tis well begged.

_Clo._ The matter, I hope, is not great, sir, begging but a beggar: Cressida was a beggar. My lady is within, sir. I will construe to them whence you come; who you are and what you would are out of my welkin, I might say 55 'element,' but the word is over-worn. [_Exit._

_Vio._ This fellow is wise enough to play the fool; And to do that well craves a kind of wit: He must observe their mood on whom he jests, The quality of persons, and the time, 60 And, like the haggard, check at every feather That comes before his eye. This is a practice As full of labour as a wise man's art: For folly that he wisely shows is fit; But wise men, folly-fall'n, quite taint their wit. 65

_Enter_ SIR TOBY, _and_ SIR ANDREW.

_Sir To._ Save you, gentleman.

_Vio._ And you, sir.

_Sir And._ Dieu vous garde, monsieur.

_Vio._ Et vous aussi; votre serviteur.

_Sir And._ I hope, sir, you are; and I am yours. 70

_Sir To._ Will you encounter the house? my niece is desirous you should enter, if your trade be to her.

_Vio._ I am bound to your niece, sir; I mean, she is the list of my voyage.

_Sir To._ Taste your legs, sir; put them to motion. 75

_Vio._ My legs do better understand me, sir, than I understand what you mean by bidding me taste my legs.

_Sir To._ I mean, to go, sir, to enter.

_Vio._ I will answer you with gait and entrance. But we are prevented. 80

_Enter_ OLIVIA _and_ MARIA.

Most excellent accomplished lady, the heavens rain odours on you!

_Sir And._ That youth's a rare courtier: 'Rain odours;' well.

_Vio._ My matter hath no voice, lady, but to your own 85 most pregnant and vouchsafed ear.

_Sir And._ 'Odours,' 'pregnant,' and 'vouchsafed:' I'll get 'em all three all ready.

_Oli._ Let the garden door be shut, and leave me to my hearing. [_Exeunt Sir Toby, Sir Andrew, and Maria._] Give 90 me your hand, sir.

_Vio._ My duty, madam, and most humble service.

_Oli._ What is your name?

_Vio._ Cesario is your servant's name, fair princess.

_Oli._ My servant, sir! 'Twas never merry world 95 Since lowly feigning was call'd compliment: You're servant to the Count Orsino, youth.

_Vio._ And he is yours, and his must needs be yours: Your servant's servant is your servant, madam.

_Oli._ For him, I think not on him: for his thoughts, 100 Would they were blanks, rather than fill'd with me!

_Vio._ Madam, I come to whet your gentle thoughts On his behalf.

_Oli._ O, by your leave, I pray you, I bade you never speak again of him: But, would you undertake another suit, 105 I had rather hear you to solicit that Than music from the spheres.

_Vio._ Dear lady,--

_Oli._ Give me leave, beseech you. I did send, After the last enchantment you did here, A ring in chase of you: so did I abuse 110 Myself, my servant and, I fear me, you: Under your hard construction must I sit, To force that on you, in a shameful cunning, Which you knew none of yours: what might you think? Have you not set mine honour at the stake 115 And baited it with all the unmuzzled thoughts That tyrannous heart can think? To one of your receiving Enough is shown: a cypress, not a bosom, Hides my heart. So, let me hear you speak.

_Vio._ I pity you.

_Oli._ That's a degree to love. 120

_Vio._ No, not a grize; for 'tis a vulgar proof, That very oft we pity enemies.

_Oli._ Why, then, methinks 'tis time to smile again. O world, how apt the poor are to be proud! If one should be a prey, how much the better 125 To fall before the lion than the wolf! [_Clock strikes._ The clock upbraids me with the waste of time. Be not afraid, good youth, I will not have you: And yet, when wit and youth is come to harvest, Your wife is like to reap a proper man: 130 There lies your way, due west.

_Vio._ Then westward-ho! Grace and good disposition attend your ladyship! You'll nothing, madam, to my lord by me?

_Oli._ Stay: I prithee, tell me what thou think'st of me. 135

_Vio._ That you do think you are not what you are.

_Oli._ If I think so, I think the same of you.

_Vio._ Then think you right: I am not what I am.

_Oli._ I would you were as I would have you be!

_Vio._ Would it be better, madam, than I am? 140 I wish it might, for now I am your fool.

_Oli._ O, what a deal of scorn looks beautiful In the contempt and anger of his lip! A murderous guilt shows not itself more soon Than love that would seem hid: love's night is noon. 145 Cesario, by the roses of the spring, By maidhood, honour, truth and every thing, I love thee so, that, maugre all thy pride, Nor wit nor reason can my passion hide. Do not extort thy reasons from this clause, 150 For that I woo, thou therefore hast no cause; But rather reason thus with reason fetter, Love sought is good, but given unsought is better.

_Vio._ By innocence I swear, and by my youth, I have one heart, one bosom and one truth, 155 And that no woman has; nor never none Shall mistress be of it, save I alone. And so adieu, good madam: never more Will I my master's tears to you deplore.

_Oli._ Yet come again; for thou perhaps mayst move 160 That heart, which now abhors, to like his love. [_Exeunt._

LINENOTES:

OLIVIA'S garden] Pope. A garden. Rowe.

with a tabor.] Malone. meeting. Capell.

[2] _thy_] F1. _the_ F2 F3 F4.

[5] _sir: I do_] _sir: and yet I do_ Capell conj.

[7] _king_] _kings_ F1.

_lies_] _lives_ Collier (Capell conj.).

[15] _had had_] _had_ Hanmer.

[29] _not thou_] _thou not_ Steevens (1793), corrected in MS.

[32] _pilchards_] Capell. _pilchers_ Ff.

[35, 97] _Count_] _Duke_ Rowe.

[36] _orb ... sun_] Ff. _orb; like the sun_ Dyce.

[40] _an_] Pope. _and_ Ff.

[41] _expenses_] _sixpence_ Badham conj.

[Gives him a piece of money. Hanmer.

[45] [Aside] Edd.

[47] _bred_] _breed_ Malone conj.

[52] _begging_] Pope. _begging,_ Ff.

[54] _construe_] _conster_ Ff. _them_] _her Hanmer._

[55] _are_] F1. _is_ F2 F3 F4.

[61] _And_] Ff. _Not_ Rann (Johnson conj.). _Nor_ Harness.

[63] _wise man's_] _wise-mans_ Ff.

[64] _folly that he_] _he that folly_ Badham conj.

[65] _wise men, folly-fall'n, quite taint_] Capell (Theobald and Tyrwhitt conj.). _wisemens folly falne, quite taint_ F1. _wise mens folly falne, quite taint_ F2 F3 F4 (_faln_ F3 F4). _wise mens folly fall'n, quite taints Rowe_ (ed. 2). _wise men's, folly fal'n, quite taints_ Theobald. _wise men's folly shewn, quite taints_ Hanmer. _wise men's folly, fall'n, quite taints_ Heath conj. _wise men, folly-blown, quite taint their wit_ Anon. conj.

[65] SIR ANDREW] Andrew Ff.

[66] SCENE II. Pope. Sir To.] Sir And. Theobald.

[68, 70] Sir And.] Sir To. Theobald.

[68] _vous garde_] _vou guard_ Ff.

[69] _vous aussi_] _vouz ousie_ F1. _vouz ausie_ F2 F3 F4.

_votre serviteur_] _vostre serviture_ Ff.

[71] Sir To.] om. Theobald.

[80] MARIA] Gentlewoman Ff.

[88] _all ready_] Malone. _already_ F1 F2. _ready_ F3 F4.

[writing in his table-book. Collier (Collier MS.).

[89] _Let_] _Maria, let_ Capell conj. reading as verse.

[90] [Exeunt....] Rowe.

## SCENE III. Pope.

[97] _You're_] _Y'are_ Ff.

[106] _I had_] _I'd_ Pope.

[107] _Dear_] _O dearest_ Hanmer.

_lady,--_] Theobald. _lady_. Ff.

[108] _Give_] _Nay, give_ Capell.

_beseech_] _I beseech_ F3 F4.