CHAPTER IV

Was it _Mackay’s_ regiment, quoth my uncle _Toby_, where the poor grenadier was so unmercifully whipp’d at _Bruges_ about the ducats? --O Christ! he was innocent! cried _Trim_, with a deep sigh. --And he was whipp’d, may it please your honour, almost to death’s door. --They had better have shot him outright, as he begg’d, and he had gone directly to heaven, for he was as innocent as your honour. ------I thank thee, _Trim_, quoth my uncle _Toby_. ----I never think of his, continued _Trim_, and my poor brother _Tom’s_ misfortunes, for we were all three school-fellows, but I cry like a coward. ----Tears are no proof of cowardice, _Trim_. --I drop them oft-times myself, cried my uncle _Toby_. ----I know your honour does, replied _Trim_, and so am not ashamed of it myself. --But to think, may it please your honour, continued _Trim_, a tear stealing into the corner of his eye as he spoke--to think of two virtuous lads with hearts as warm in their bodies, and as honest as God could make them--the children of honest people, going forth with gallant spirits to seek their fortunes in the world--and fall into such evils! --poor _Tom!_ to be tortured upon a rack for nothing--but marrying a Jew’s widow who sold sausages--honest _Dick Johnson’s_ soul to be scourged out of his body, for the ducats another man put into his knapsack! --O! --these are misfortunes, cried _Trim_, --pulling out his handkerchief--these are misfortunes, may it please your honour, worth lying down and crying over.

--My father could not help blushing.

’Twould be a pity, _Trim_, quoth my uncle _Toby_, thou shouldst ever feel sorrow of thy own--thou feelest it so tenderly for others. --Alack-o-day, replied the corporal, brightening up his face------your honour knows I have neither wife or child ----I can have no sorrows in this world. ----My father could not help smiling. --As few as any man, _Trim_, replied my uncle _Toby_; nor can I see how a fellow of thy light heart can suffer, but from the distress of poverty in thy old age--when thou art passed all services, _Trim_--and hast outlived thy friends. ----An’ please your honour, never fear, replied _Trim_, chearily. ----But I would have thee never fear, _Trim_, replied my uncle _Toby_, and therefore, continued my uncle _Toby_, throwing down his crutch, and getting up upon his legs as he uttered the word _therefore_--in recompence, _Trim_, of thy long fidelity to me, and that goodness of thy heart I have had such proofs of--whilst thy master is worth a shilling----thou shalt never ask elsewhere, _Trim_, for a penny. _Trim_ attempted to thank my uncle _Toby_--but had not power----tears trickled down his cheeks faster than he could wipe them off --He laid his hands upon his breast----made a bow to the ground, and shut the door.

----I have left _Trim_ my bowling-green, cried my uncle _Toby_. ----My father smiled. ------I have left him moreover a pension, continued my uncle _Toby_. ----My father looked grave.

## CHAPTER V Is this a fit time, said my father to himself, to talk of PENSIONS and GRENADIERS?

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